I suppose ALL brains have a limited capacity for how much processing and outside stimulus they can handle. As we know, however, ADHD brains often have additional limitations to processing and ability to take in outside stimulation. I seem to have found my limit. And I found it in a funny way.
When I am not taking medication and not putting conscious effort into using certain coping strategies, I’m pretty irritable and even though I’m a smart person and I have the ability to organize things, life gets a little messy. Well this morning I was thinking very satisfied thoughts to myself, because even though my bag situation needs to be attended to (see yesterday’s post), I seem to have fallen into some routines. Yes, it was conscious but I’m still surprised at how pleasant and relatively simple it has been. Instead of worrying about time, recently, I decided to reframe how I deal with my morning. Instead, I have a certain list of things that I have to do. Some of them involve self-care. Some of them involve animal care. Some of them involve household care. In my brain, I’ve labeled those “things that have to happen in the morning”.
What alerted me to the new smoothness of my morning routine was an external cue. I noticed the other day, that when I came downstairs for the last time before leaving for work, all dressed and ready to roll out the door, my small dog, who spends his day in his crate, saw me, jumped to his feet and ran into his crate. I have him trained so that when I say “crate” he zips into his crate. But I hadn’t said it. I realized that I have actually been regular enough with my routine recently, that he now understands that when I come down all ready to go, after “the walk” that it’s time for him to do his crate thing.
So yeah, my morning routine feels great lately, I get up, I move my car, I take the dogs to the backyard, then for a walk, then we come back, I give the cat her medicine, then I go upstairs, get dressed and ready to go, and…then the little dog jumps into his crate, I feed the fish, and I go to work.
The house, in general, is feeling more organized and better tended to as well.
This all sounds great, right? Oh…it IS. But I haven’t managed to add MORE to my list of things I can manage. They’re just prioritized differently. My office is a mess., for example. So my private life is better physically tended…but other stuff is a little sloppy right now. Partially because of the bag issue that I need to solve…partially because I’ve apparently chosen a different set of priorities.
PRIORITIES. Now see…I think this means that treatment is working…right? I mean I need to put my private life above how organized my car is. Of course, when the kids get in the car and…I have to clean the car out first…ack.
I guess having it all isn’t a realistic expectation. My GOD I need to clean the office kitchen though.