Okay, I don’t want to disappoint anyone, after my planner breakthrough post, you know, about sticking things in little boxes and living happily ever after. And I don’t want to discourage anyone from using a planner, or any other organizational tools.
But OMFG WHY IS THIS SO EFFING HARD FOR ME?! WTF IS WRONG WITH ME?!
I’m just going to cut to the chase here, folks: WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU CANNOT GET THE THINGS THAT YOU PUT IN THE LITTLE BOXES DONE THAT DAY. AND YOU HAVE (YES, THIS WARRANTS ALL CAPS, DON’T FUCK WITH ME RIGHT NOW) – AND YOU HAVE PLANNED THINGS OUT FOR DAYS AND THERE ARE THINGS IN ALL THE BOXES ALREADY.
Then the things don’t get done one day. Maybe it’s because your focus/productivity ratio sucked that day. Maybe it’s because something unexpected happened in the course of the day and it deserved your attention and the things in the little boxes needed to be back-burnered. Life requires flexibility.
I CANNOT HANDLE FLEXIBILITY.
Yes, I see that I’m being a little black and white here. But seriously, what am I supposed to do? I’m a smart person and I’m looking at the planner here and if a day gets effed up, every following domino will eat shit.
Hence, I’ve been ignoring my planner for about 36 hours now I guess, I don’t know, and it’s not worth checking a clock and doing painful math to figure out. I’ve got layers to deal with here, it’s clear. The first one is that I have too many things going on in my life (at the moment…I was at a good level but one project got a little out of control and I’m in the process of reining it in again…). Sometimes I have control over that and yet, sometimes I legitimately don’t. I can only control what I can control. Isn’t that a foundation recovery principle in every 12-step group known to mankind?
Controlling for the times when I do periodically overfill my own schedule…how am I supposed to maintain flexibility and stay organized? I CANNOT end up with days that have like 24 things in the box, after a three day fiesta of curveballs. I don’t have a lot of to-dos that are optional. Most people who have families don’t. You can’t stop feeding kids, or stop taking pets to the vet, or stop cleaning at least some part of the endless mess created by kids and pets in your home, or stop going to work to make sure that you can afford to feed kids and take pets to the vet. You can’t stop cultivating your additional sources of income when the economy still kind of sucks and again, your household has fixed as well as sadistically surprising financial needs. Then lets say it’s one of those days where, for whatever reason, three members of your household (two- or four-legged, whoever the Universe has elected to fuck your schedule that day) end up barfing all over the place. Most likely when you are trying to leave for work. And often in a place where you are most likely to step in it at least once.
Barfing occurs. And the entire rest of the day is fucked. Take that, little planner box of perfection. Now, anyone with a family knows that you also have no way of predicting just how many of these barf-surprise days you might have in one week. You might not have one for a month. But then again…you could have another one again tomorrow. You just don’t know. But the barf (both literally, and as a metaphor) always wins. Always.
And that’s the point I’m coming to here, folks. The barf always wins. ALWAYS. I’m not sure yet how to factor in the barf effectively, so that my little plans aren’t slaughtered. This is why I kind of don’t like having to make plans…because putting in the effort of creating them, only to see them brutally and smellariffically destroyed on the daily, is a lot to take.
And I have a pretty strong stomach for barf odors. Just ask my husband.