I keep having moments of “oooh, this would be a great blog post” and then getting distracted (ha). So let’s recommence this blogging thing, shall we?
I swear my dog has ADHD. He was nearly untrainable until 18 months of age. He’s actually very bright but (doesn’t this sound familiar) requires lots of reminders and refocusing, and you have to be able to do it FAST or you lose him entirely. Case in point: Generally it’s pretty normal to take a dog out and the dog knows what to do and does his business (our other dog does anyway…and every other dog I have ever known). Nope, not my dog.
He dilly dallies. This is far beyond looking for the right spot. He’s not even looking because he’s not even thinking about going to the bathroom. He’s noticing the air. He’s thinking about if he even wants to be awake. Or he’s really high on life that morning and shoots out the door like a leashed cannonball. He doesn’t like his feet wet, so if the grass is dewy or it’s rained, the potty trip is extended because he just can’t get over it. He just CANNOT.
It can be first thing in the morning and he won’t go to the bathroom because he’s too busy sniffing every square inch of the yard. And so…I have to remind him why he’s out there. He knows the words “poop” and “pee”. So…after I’ve had all I can STAND of the dilly dallying, I’ll look at him and say “Chico, don’t you need to poop, or pee”. He smirks. Yes, he SMIRKS, as if to say “oh…that’s right, I forgot”. And then does what I call the snort. It’s like if a human gave you a really impatient and annoyed “sigh”. You don’t know if he’s annoyed with himself, or with you, but he’s annoyed.
At least for the moment that it takes him to find something else interesting to do. Sometimes after he’s reminded, he’ll putter around and find himself a spot, but that’s only about half the time. If a dog barks in the next yard, or a cat runs by, or a bird makes a noise, or the other dog shuffles by, or he steps on something wet, or he finds a dead worm to roll on, all bets are off.
To give you a visual, if you’re just tuning in – he weighs 6 lbs. And he owns me. He could have been easily eaten as an hors d’oeuvre by a less understanding human. I’ve visualized those little drumsticks on a plate, with a nice sauce, many times – usually on a really early morning where I actually have to be somewhere on time and I’m standing there watching him discover every blade of grass like it’s the first one he’s ever seen.
It’s gotten a little better as he’s aged, and he’s four now…but he totally has Adult ADHDog. We need canine stimulant medication. I smell a pharmaceutical revolution. And it can’t come fast enough, because the “OMG MY FEET ARE WET” thing just about puts me over the edge (normally that’s first thing in the morning and my own meds may not have kicked in yet).