This was going to be a tandem post, but Sonny won’t write with me…we each have a french martini in hand and he says that he’s “too drunken”. This, as he’s scurrying about the house, cleaning for Christmas guests.
So I’ll tell you a little Christmas story. I’m drunken, but I think it adds to the spark of the narrative. We decided that our 5-year-old should have a lizard. He’s obsessed with lizards. Snakes. Turtles. Amphibians and reptiles. He loves them all, and it seems to be a long-term relationship, so we decided that a lizard would be just the thing.
Before you freak out: we know that animals are not toys, we understand that a 5-year-old should not be left unattended with a living creature in his care. So we contacted our state Fish and Game office and asked for advice on a good beginner reptile/amphibian pet…and we know that in reality, we the parents will be caring for the pet.
The timing could not be better. We just moved to the new house, so there’s more room, our family is in a better frame of mind, and all of the mammal creatures are well cared for. This includes 3 children, 2 dogs and 2 cats. In the apartment, meeting everyone’s needs was more challenging for a variety of reasons…here, the kids have more space, and the animals have more freedom, and I am able to set things up so that it is much easier to make sure everyone has what they need. The kitties have lovely windows to sit in, the dogs have a routine of going out and in and out again in the morning with what we call “first meal” and then again in the evening with “second meal”…it’s delightful. And the cat-box has a home that everyone can agree upon, and gets cleaned 1-2 times/day.
And so…we have a new lizard addition to the family. He’s a leopard gecko, a good starter-lizard. And…and here’s my point…HE IS FUCKING AWESOME. OR SHE. WE DON’T KNOW YET! BUT WE ARE WAAAAAAY TOO EXCITED ABOUT HIM/SHE/HER/IT!!!!!
So excited that if we have unlimited income and lots of time on our hands my husband and I would be bringing more lizards and snakes and stuff home RIGHT NOW! BECAUSE WE ARE SO EXCITED!!!!!
Both Sonny and I are shifting manually right now…one lizard at a time ADHD people, one lizard at a time (and all the cool live food and accessories and stuff….)!!!!!